The eve of change….

Here I am…….. 5pm on the eve of school going back (one child at high school for the first time) and a significant change to my work hours. I am excited and positive about how this year will go, with just a small touch of apprehension.

Being a working mum is tough. It is super difficult to strike a balance between feeling fulfilled in yourself and having enough time for the kids and their multitude of activities. Guilt seems to be a common feeling.

Each year I plan and schedule to make sure there is someone each day to get them from A to B, feed them, get them in the right uniform etc without them having to miss out on anything. That has included myself, husband, grandparents and friends. Always someone, but every day different.

There have always been last minute changes to schedules and associated stressed phone calls for help. Which is ok. My family and friends want to help, but I am so tired of asking and worrying and not wanting to ask and feeling embarrassed and guilty.

So…….. this year I am very lucky to be attempting to work school hours. I say attempting because I am just not 100% certain that it will work in my job. I can not always guarantee I finish on time, but the kids are now old enough to walk home and let themselves in. If I am 10 minutes late it shouldn’t be an issue.

But I will be the one there, every day.

Now, the other reason for apprehension is it is entirely possible that after a week or two of nagging kids to do homework and racing to basketball practice and having afternoon tea rejected, I may just want to go back to working full days!!!!

All I know is, we as parents are all trying our best to make things work for our families and what works for one family might not for another.

I am going into this year without guilt. I am going to wrap it up in a little parcel and leave it behind and if this plan doesn’t work…….. there is always plan B


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